An estimated one in three Americans will be diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease or dementia. The startling statistic translates to millions of Americans living with a dementia diagnosis and many more millions of family caregivers providing support to them.

When your parent is diagnosed with dementia, it can be devastating for both of you. What should you do? What steps should you take to help your parent have the care and support he or she needs?

Consider these four critical steps you and your family should take when an older loved one gets a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s or other dementia disorder.

1. The Right Diagnosis

The first step is to work with your loved one’s doctor to rule out treatable causes of cognitive loss. Some forms of dementia aren’t caused by neurological deterioration. They could be side effects of other physical ailments like heart disease, brain masses, or intracranial bleeds. A severe urinary tract infection can cause dementia-like symptoms. It is important to review all medications with the primary care physician. Over-medication or drug interactions from prescription regimens that aren’t coordinated could trigger memory loss. In such cases, treatment of the underlying causes might alleviate dementia symptoms.

Your parent’s doctor may order blood work and scans to rule out other causes. If the doctor suspects that adverse drug interactions have caused your parent’s dementia-like symptoms, they will revise the medication regimen. You may be asked to help monitor your parent’s medication compliance and to log symptoms to help the doctor reach a definitive diagnosis. Often, dementia symptoms have no discernible cause, and supportive care is the best option.

2. Ask Questions, Get Support

Your parent will need a lot of understanding and support. Eventually, he or she will need caregiving from a family member, in-home care providers, or a residential memory care setting such as assisted living or skilled nursing.

Your parent will become increasingly reliant on you to make informed healthcare decisions. You should begin learning as much as you can about dementia caregiving so that you’ll be ready to make the right choices for your parent. 

You might consider joining a dementia caregiver support group. There are several here in Cincinnati, including the group meeting monthly in Hyde Park. It may be helpful to network with other caregivers and be mutually supportive. The Center for Memory Support and Inclusion provided by Episcopal Retirement Services is an excellent source of information and support.

The Alzheimer’s Association — Greater Cincinnati Chapter and the Council on Aging can connect you with learning opportunities, support groups, and other resources. Discuss what you learn, especially online with your parent’s doctor.

3. Make financial, legal and medical arrangements

If your parent’s dementia hasn’t yet progressed to the point that he or she is debilitated, make sure you work with him or her to develop a care plan so that you are prepared when care in your home may not be possible.

Now is the time for your parent to choose a residential retirement care provider, designate his or her medical, legal, and financial powers of attorney, and complete a living will or advance care directive. If your parent has specific ideas for dispensing assets, those should be spelled out in legal documentation while he or she can still direct.  It is essential that that these documents are executed when your loved one is still able to make their wishes known.

4. Plan for additional support or possible move

Dementia symptoms may progress slowly but rapidly worsen. It may not be safe for your parent to continue living alone. If you or one of your siblings is willing to provide daily care, it may be time to move your parent into a family caregiver’s home or hire a live-in care partner.

Or, your parent might be interested in moving into a Continuing Care Retirement Community (CCRC), which can provide everything from assisted living with memory support therapy to advanced round-the-clock nursing care.

A CCRC can provide your parent a way to socialize with other seniors and live as independently as possible, for as long as possible. They can engage in enriching activities, and you and your family will have peace of mind. You will know that your parent is being closely looked after.

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A dementia or Alzheimer’s diagnosis is a challenge for everyone involved.  To be sure, it’s the beginning of a challenging chapter. Getting a plan soon after a diagnosis is important.  By taking these four steps to set affairs in order and arrange for memory care, you and your parent can alleviate some of the worries.  The result is that you and your loved one can focus on enjoying your time together.

Click here to download our Dementia Guide. We've created this Dementia Guidebook as a resource for caregivers of people living with memory loss.  You can also download our Financial Answers Decision Guide to help you plan for care costs. Marjorie P. Lee Retirement Community has decades of experience caring for individuals with Alzheimer’s and dementia. And we’re here to help you.